Upon Awakening
by redrum and wine
Summary: Kyou's version sequel to Sweet Dreams


Ok, wow, it's been a looooong time since I've written anything!  
Oo

Well, just so you know, this is a sequel to my first one-shot "Sweet Dreams". So if you haven't read it, then go back and read it now….you don't have to, but it would make a lot more sense if you did. sweat drop I dunno, I just felt like writing something so this is it. For fans from my other story "Child of Memories", I hate where it's going and I just don't feel like writing through it right now. sweat drop Sorry. That doesn't mean that I've given up on it, oh no, I'm much too stubborn for something like that, as anyone who knows me can testify.

So, anyways, this is the sequel to Sweet Dreams, it's actually from Kyou's point of view this time around and him….well, I'll just let you find out on your own ok. I'm going to apologize in advance for any oc-ness that might occur. By the way, I forgot to tell you in the last story, the cure for the curse is falling in love, true love will break the spell and yada dada da...just so you know...it plays a role in this story and I forgot all about it in the last one. Hehe...whoops.

Disclaimer: If I owned Fruba it wouldn't be sooooo damn long…..end of discussion…. .

Upon My Wakening

_The sun…..it's so bright…._

Kyou groaned and slowly opened his eyes, squinting at the offending open window. Rubbing his eyes groggily he sat up, feeling something slip from around his waist. He glared over to his slumbering partner, not at all surprised to see him there but angry that he should even dare to touch him in his sleep. He got up quickly, grabbing up his pants and pulling on his shirt as he walked out of the room, letting the door fall closed behind him.

There was no school today, spring break. He walked past the kitchen and yanked open the shoji door, stepping outside into the crisp morning air. His thin t-shirt did nothing to block out the cool breeze that whipped his already tousled hair into his face. He growled angrily, shoving it away from his eyes. Suddenly the old bible verse spun into his head, as silent as the breeze blowing through his hair.

_If thy hand or thy foot offend thee, cut them off and cast them from thee….It is better to enter into life halt or maimed, rather than be cast into everlasting fire.  
And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee….It is better to enter into life with one eye, rather than to be cast into hell fire._

Kyou sank heavily to the cold steps, his head sinking to his folded arms.

_**What have I done….**_

He let out a quick sob, his breath catching in his chest.

_**What have I become….**_

His mother used to quote the bible when he was young. His poor mother who wanted nothing more than a happy life….the mother he had killed….who had been desperate for anything that could help her cursed son, even turning to Christianity when all else had failed. She had said that to him one day returning from pre-school. He was so frightened by the look in her eyes as she said it that he couldn't sleep that night….or the one following.

But what could he do….what was he supposed to do when the thing that offended him most was his very own heart….He hadn't wanted it to happen, had done everything possible to prevent it, had even lied and said that he hated that damn rat, lied to cover up how he really felt inside. Even now he was trying to hide it, trying to make sense of it all without allowing anyone to discover his secret. He wouldn't allow Yuki to touch him or even give him more than a passing glance in front of others, he avoided him as much as he could, especially at home in front of the rest of the family. He bad-mouthed him more than ever, but it hurt even more now than it had before anything had happened.

He hadn't meant to take him, had never wanted it to end up this way. He told himself that all **normal** guys went through it as a part of growing up, that it would soon pass and he would be ok again. But things hadn't turned out ok at all. They had been alone at the house that night, the only two there and it just….happened. Yuki had put him down again and in the midst of the shouting Kyo, in an effort to shut him up did the unthinkable without even bothering to think about it. He had kissed him. And to his surprise, Yuki had kissed him back. It wasn't normal, it wasn't natural, and it was tearing him up from the inside out. Having to live a double life, lying to those he cared about. He really was a monster.

He heard something behind him, someone else was awake this early. He sat up quickly, using his shirt to quickly brush his eyes. No one came outside. It must be Tohru….that's right, she was leaving today, going back to her grandfather's house. Now that her aunt and uncle were gone he had no one to care for him and that's why she was leaving, to take care of him….or so she said. She had been debating the issue for over a week, but had decided suddenly last night to leave for good. He would miss her, miss her laugh and her smile, especially her smile. He loved her, almost more than he could bear. But the kindest thing to do for her would to let her leave and not be burdened with his affections, it was safer that way. It was always safer that way….

A tear slipped down his left cheek. Kyou let it fall….who was there to see? The shoji door clattered open noisily, causing him to practically jump out of his skin. "Oh Kyou! I'm sorry! I didn't know that anyone else was awake! Come inside, I'll make some—Kyou….have you….been crying?!?." "NO! I….I…." he struggled to regain control of himself, his own emotions threatening to overwhelm him. "I…." He sobbed. "Oh Kyou!!!!" Tohru cried, rushing to his side, "What's wrong, I-" she was cut short as Kyou wrapped his arms around her, pulling her to him in a tight embrace, his head nestled against her neck. She hugged him back. Even if she didn't know what was wrong she would try comfort his the best she could until his body at least stopped trembling. "Kyou, tell me what's wrong!" she said, confused more than anything. She had only seen him cry once, when he had reverted back to his true form in front of her. When he became a….no, she wouldn't think of it like that.

Eventually his breathing slowed and he stepped away from her, holding her at arms length. She didn't know how long they had stood like that or how long Kyou had been crying before hand either. "Sorry…I." He blushed, turning his head away quickly, already embarrassed enough. "That's alright, I just--" "Do you think I'm a monster?" he blurted it out quickly, cutting her off again. "Am I really a monster?" he sank slowly back down onto the steps, folding his hands around his body and looking over the back yard, refusing to look at Tohru again.

Her mind quickly jumped back to that rainy night, his true form….She shook it quickly out of her head, not wanting to think back upon it. He's not a monster. "Of course I don't think that! Why would I?!?" she sat down beside him, keeping her distance still puzzled by the sudden change in his demeanor. "It's…it's nothing, I just…." He didn't finish, he just kept his eyes trained on the ground in front of him, not daring to look up. "Kyou, I know the real you. I know your not a monster, far from it. No one who knows you could ever compare you to one." She scooted closer to him, daring to try and get near enough to see his face. "Your leaving today….?"

"I…uh, yes, I am."

He nodded mutely. They sat there like that for awhile, both of them silently contemplating their own futures. "Tohru…."

"Yes Kyou?"

"If you loved someone, what would you do?"

Tohru's heart skipped a beat. Her mind quickly racing around for an answer, thinking back to yesterday, the conversation between her and Yuki, her own rejection. She swallowed hard, glancing over to find Kyou looking straight at her, his eyes screaming for an answer. "I…."she swallowed again. "I would tell them."

"But what if they don't love you? What if they reject you?"

Her heart was racing. This was coming dangerously close to her own situation, nearly bringing her to tears aswell. But thinking on it, even though she had been rejected, she didn't regret telling Yuki how she felt. At least now she knew where she stood in her own life. "I would still tell them," she stammered, blushing despite herself. "You never know until you tell them.

…."But what if your love threatened to destroy you, what if it went against every moral that you had ever been taught….what is there to do then?"

Tohru didn't know the answer. She doubted that anyone knew the answer. "I….don't know Kyou. I guess the person has to find out on their own if their love is worth it or not." She stood up quickly. "Now, come inside….I'll get breakfast started. (avoiding the subject and trying to escape)

"No thanks. I'll be in in a minute. Go on without me."

"Are you sure?" Kyou nodded.

"Ok then, I'll see you at breakfast." She said before slowly closing the shoji door behind her.

_Is it worth it….am I willing to risk everything I know….everything I am….just to be with him…._

He got up quickly and walked inside, past Tohru who was busy in the kitchen, and silently back to his room. The door closed behind him with a click as he walked over to the bed, staring down at the slender body curled up under the sheets.

_I hate him….but this feeling, his feeling that threatens to consume me, that threatens to consume us both….is this love as well? I love him, the pretty boy, the rat. Is this the undescribed part of the curse, to love thine enemy?_

_**He kept you from paradise**_ a voice whispered through his mind, the voice of his other form, now locked away inside of his mind, the contained curse of the cat. Kyo hadn't transformed in a long time._ I know that, but what I feel can't be suppressed any more. I Love Him._

He slid back into the bed, not caring that he was fully dressed. He wrapped his arms around the curled figure, nestling his nose into his hair. Yuki turned over to face him, his bleary eyes barely focused on Kyou. "There you are….I thought that you had left me" he whispered.

"No, I never left you, I could never leave you. It was all a dream." Yuki nodded, accepting this excuse for now, resting his forehead on Kyou's chest. "Were damned, you and I." Kyou whispered into his hair.

"Since when have you ever lived your life by another's standards? How can I be damned when I feel so happy here, with you?" he smiled, his eyes still closed. Kyou didn't comment. Yawning, Yuki looked up at Kyou. 'Who is to damn us when this feeling that I have is so pure, so happily free of any and all reason?"

"No one. No one can."

"Exactly." Still smiling he closed his eyes and let himself sink into Kyou's scent, loving every second that he could spend with him. "I love you Kyou.", his whispered pledge almost inaudible.

"I know." Kyou looked down at Yuki, feeling the other's heartbeat through his shirt.

_Yuki, I just hope that you can understand….can understand why I cannot say what you want to hear. Not just yet, not right now. These feelings, this emotion, it is there, it will always be there, but to say it aloud, to tell you everything that I have to say….I'm just not ready to do this, not just yet. Please Yuki, I just hope that you can understand._

And for some strange reason, he felt like he did.

_**I felt like I was dreaming. That everything that had happened was too good to be true. That if I dared to wake, this beautiful dream would disappear forever and leave me here alone again. But I woke up, despite my protests, only to find that I wasn't dreaming at all. That you were still here, with me, by my side. What a lovely dream this is….**_

So, how was it?

**_Ban_**-Out of character.

**_Skye_**-A complete, sinful wast of literary talent.

Ok, so I know what they think...what about everyone else?


End file.
